The sun is streaming through the window and it is 50ºF; a stark contrast to the snowy 30º it is in Burlington right now. I am still traumatized by that place. It will probably take years to reconcile the carnage that moving to Burlington, Vermont did to my life. Coming to Portland again is my way of re-setting; 'drying out', if you will. Who knows where I will go next? But this is what I need right now until the next step makes itself clear to me.
Speaking of drying out: This is Day 10 of not drinking, and for some reason, despite it being 12:45p.m. on the last Tuesday in January, I am starting to feel it. Just a lil bit, in that my nerves are hurting. Then again, it may be the 'medicine'. I don't usually smoke, though since I've been in Oregon again, MJ has been pretty near thrown at me. I consider detoxing from alcohol to be a condition alleviated by such medicine.
I awoke at Uriah's house and had hot, hot sex with him a couple of times and then hit some herb and put on the Happy Glasses and rode my bike here to SE Grind. My phone is dead and I have "Somebody That I Used to Know" in repeat. Finished an article or two for some cash and going to bike home before having to return here by bike for Occupier stuff, then hopefully be picked up for Dub Step Tuesday. I'm in love with Portland today.
Yesterday I woke up at Elijah's house with him and Ahijah. We had the absolute hottest 3-way ever, all afternoon. Thinking about it now makes me feel so in love with both of them. Talking about it even on this blog makes me a bit bashful. I feel so blessed. I'm in love with Jezebel, and with Uriah too. Polyamory at it's finest right now. It opens you to loving everything and everyone and life. It's a feeling I can't shake off, and don't want to. Ironically, it took me being alone all day in a coffee shop to let the reality of all this love sink into me. I don't even know if I can face Jezebel and Elijah tonight without wanting to just spend the entire evening making love with them and letting the emotions consume my entire soul and life.
Elijah, Jezebel, Uriah, Ahijah and I are all native Portlandians, BTW. I'm pretty sure that's how this all happened.
Elijah & I spent some time with his mom and her bf yesterday, too, and that was a great experience. They are good people. E & I spent about an hour going through his Star Trek action figures and talking about ST and being complete dorks. It's sort of miraculous how all of this is culminated and took off so perfectly and synergistically.
I want to sing praises for Portland from the rooftops, for being my home and being the place I can come back to so as to regain my spirit and continue on the adventure up through my life vortex. I thought Vermont took everything from me, but it didn't: It only stripped away a false start. Everything that I am and that I have is here, with me, and always will be.
There is something so great about being alive right now. An awakened feeling that I thought was dead for a while. Something in me that grew by leaps and bounds yesterday.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Sunny Tuesday
Labels:
Ahijah,
alcohol,
Burlington,
coffee shops,
Elijah,
Jezebel,
sex,
snow,
sunshine,
Today was a Good Day,
Uriah,
weed,
work,
writing
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