Fantasy

I re-enlisted my OkCupid, only so I could find this letter again. Then I locked my profile down so that straight people can't see it.

Two nights ago, I met the guy I wrote this to. He was all about it. He met Jezebel and Thom and Thom's roommates, and he hung in there. So, he has many many points over Halah. I'm going to give him a second chance. I think I would go well with him. He wins MAJOR points for loving the fact that I was an hour late meeting him. "I love when people are late," he says. "It shows creativity." *Swoon*. This on the heels of getting the third degree at work twice this week. Also, he MAJORLY has that over Halah. Blerg... What a horrendous mistake about Halah. He's such a short pretentious fuck.

I wrote this drunk from my iPhone to said hot date, and I want to edit it and improve it, but I'll just leave it as it was for the purposes of this blog:

I'm definitely intrigued by you. Maybe I do secretly want to marry you, it would look good to polite society and mostly for my career, to which I'm already really married anyway. I'm a writer, so I also have a career where I do what I want. I don't get paid yet to write about whatever I want, but one day I will. I'm just breaking in. I'll stay home all day writing and getting railed by the personal trainer, tip the maid, drink wine and maybe snort some uppers, and have dinner ready for you after you get done with practice. Sometimes you can be gone with your girlfriend and I'll paint and watch movies all night, maybe we'll host orgiastic parties with our fabulous friends. I'm smart, sexy, and incredibly personable, yet sweet and polite. You'll never find arm candy like me.

I have that fantasy.

Or maybe you're an alpha male who secretly wants a triad (mmf or mff, doesn't matter). Hopefully poly-fidelitous at first, just like an inseparable couple, only with three. At some point though, and this is just the fantasy talking, I want the three or even 4 of us to unleash our sexual dynamite on the world in some rockstar way. I'm down for it to get all culty, hence the extended references in my profile to Heinlein characters. Ultimately there must be some sci-fi nerd out there w this same fantasy, who's dominant and sexually powerful but not masochistic. I think nerds like the internet, as I do. Hence why I'm on here.

Who knows. The first fantasy is more realistic and probably more palatable to polite society, my friends and family. The second is gutsy and requires stepping into one's full power. Perhaps there's a combination of both, or perhaps there is something in store behind door #3... 

In other news, I'm having some difficulty with Tamara, and it's because of Josiah and the shit he pulled while I was in Tuscon/San Diego. I never saw Josiah again, either. He had a heroin problem, all the more reason why letting him stay at my place and thinking it was going to be OK was a bad idea. Anyway, I am either getting my place back from Zeruah or moving in with Ishbar, the latter idea Isaiah is in love with. Already he's annoying me saying things like, "Maybe then you'll get the threesum you've always wanted." Umm... What? You mean the one you want that I have actually zero interest in. This kind of shit always annoyed me about him.

Anyway. I'm buried in work I have to do and am not doing.