Monday, October 15, 2012

Job Worries

General warning sign (Older)
General warning sign (Older) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
I have a feeling my job is about to get scaled back. I'm not sure why, I just have a premonition.
Since 2008, I've been 'let go' or laid off or whatnot a few times. I have a sixth sense about these things. I was so into the idea of having this as a job and so excited about it I was nearly bragging. So of course I see why I need to be more humble in that regard and maybe that is why it is going away.

I knew when my previous salary job was going 'freelance' weeks before I was handed my final paycheck and told I would be paid by the job in the future. (I place 'freelance' in quotes because they have yet to approach me for doing any more paid jobs after giving me money to simply finish the jobs they already had me working on. That clearly they could not do themselves, I might add.) They started having meetings without me, and come to think of it, Solomon just got laid off and that was one of the warning signs for him, as well.

That isn't really one of the signs on-hand, though. The sign on-hand is that all of a sudden my editor decided to put a hand in something that was meant to be my job, for no reason. She wants to get involved with all sorts of things that I was made responsible for, which is bad for me, of course, since she's the damn editor and has been at this for something like 20 years. The only reason she never had a hand in it before is because she didn't know how, but now wants to learn, and also has another job that pays quite a lot more money.

So I immediately felt that as a warning sign. Then, mysteriously, I was told that there would be a meeting on Tuesday and the only thing I needed to do for it was finish what I had been working on before. I have no idea what it's about, and I'm having lunch w the boss before that, so all of it seems not good. NOT AT ALL!

I have a problem with being late to everything, so that could potentially be it. It's annoying but I usually get a warning first if it's an issue for someone... I did get one at the workshop, though, and the lateness has gotten worse since my watch broke. Now I have some money to fix it, although I am in a major hole owing my roommate rent money. We are talking, August, September, and October. Good thing it's very cheap! This one paycheck should cover the entire thing. Anyway, I digress. That could be part of it, although for what I do, I am not entirely sure that it wholly matters other than with these meetings, anyway.

Final warning sign: I wrote a very enthusiastic email today and got absolutely no response to it :(

As I told my mom, it's mid-month and technically I was at this workshop for six days straight, 24/7, so they have to pay me something at this point. So even if they tell me they no longer need me at Tuesday's meeting, I will at least get enough to cover my rent issues. Eve was interestingly kind of upset that I didn't come to her recently when I was totally broke and sweating it out without food stamps. Alas. I hate going to her. My roommate just used up all my food stamps for the month yet again, but I am OK with it, as I will have a bit of money hopefully and also I don't need all that much anyway, really. I am staying put in this situation here until further notice.

I want help getting my shit out of storage ASAP. I don't care what my friends say or how far out of town it is (it isn't, BTW), I live on the west side in the fucking hills with a beautiful view and it is nice, and it's cheap enough that I can be a writer in a shitty economy and make money here and there and occasionally get a little further ahead.

BOTTOM LINE: I will be OK if this job doesn't totally pan out, and I was definitely wrong to count the chickens before they hatched, and I kind of knew it as I was doing it. Good thing I'm keeping up with freelance and starting to earn some money with that finally. It's a terrible feast-or-famine with that, but it's enough to get by now that I'm living within my means. Yes, I got caught up in thinking how I would just be able to buy a watch and to get my driver's license back and pay off some bills and whatnot. Maybe get my decent credit score back or something. But, looks like not this time.

I do keep getting closer with every go around, though. And at least my life is fun and interesting in the couple hours per day I don't spend writing.

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